Changing & Acceptance...

I am pretty sure that I have accepted that the theme of this blog seems to be “Changes”.

Change  is a concept I was beyond uncomfortable with…in a past life. As I grow older, I guess I understand that change is inevitable and sometimes, it is really necessary. And even more often, it can be so good! That being said, my life is completely different today than it was a year ago. Even a month ago.

If you have seen previous posts, you can see some of the changes that we have gone through in just the past two months. Jaxon is now in a toddler bed- and doing great! Jason did so well in January and February at work that we paid off every penny of debt that we had and bought a second vehicle. You can also see in a self-reflection post that my entire mentality has changed in regards to priorities. Another good thing.

Who I am today is definitely not who I was when I was 25, and that person wasn’t the same person as that lively, 15 year old cheerleader without a care in the world.

Both Jason and my priorities, even from a few months ago, are now different than when we originally began this journey a year ago and are wildly different than the dreams and ideals we had when we were first dating and planning to get married. But, that is life. Things change, people change. They evolve constantly and grow and mold themselves with the changes and experiences they endure in life.

Even with family, the connections we thought were so important a year ago no longer matter. Who we thought we needed to be by our side has changed (to a degree). Today, we focus on the people who make the effort to be a part of our lives. We no longer worry about the people who act as though including us is a chore. We always attempt to include everyone in our lives, but sometimes, that just isn’t going to happen. And that is OK.

When you marry someone, you marry their family. But different families don’t always mesh. It’s the tale as old as time. Some things need work and “grease” added to the wheel to “fit” and some things are just too different to meld together. That’s okay. Acceptance is part of life and we have accepted that our family dynamic just isn’t the cookie cutter version that so many people have or want. We’re different. We are us. Some people may no longer be in our lives, but we’re still OK, we’re still happy and healthy and thriving. And that truly is all that matters at the end of the day.

As most parents would agree, your child is your world- your significant other becomes secondary (or, at least, that is the way I feel it should be). I think it becomes more challenging as you add more children to the mix, but one constant remains in focus- your child is always going to be the most important person in your world. Jason understands, and feels the same way- Jaxon is number one. We love each other immensely – but Jaxon is the most important person in both our worlds. That will never change. It will be shared with the next child, but the sentiment will remain for eternity. I wish all parents employed that sentiment, but not all parents were cut from the same cloth and don’t feel the same way. That is sad for them, because I think they would enjoy a love beyond measure if they accepted that their kids should be their world. I am not saying that parents don't deserve to have "me time"...because I definitely think that is extremely important. Parents cannot maintain their sanity if they cannot maintain their identity. I just feel that their child should come first 98% of the time and they should carve out time to entertain themselves, rather than worry about themselves first and allowing their children to come second. Jason and I have both enjoyed some "me time" on occasion over the past few months and it has kept me sane and happy. I treasure it and I enjoy my son even more when I get home and he missed me. Life is truly about the little moments.

There are more changes on the horizon for this Lewy clan and I will bring more updates as they become available.

Here is a quote I like:

“Don’t be afraid to change. You may lose something good, but you may gain something better” – author unknown (to me)

Have a great Friday! xoxo